Being so inconsiderate

Honk! Honk! b@dw0rd$! It's a daily struggle on Bangalore roads. Every single person is in a hurry, except the people crossing the roads. People crossing the road, seem to have learnt an art to put their lives in danger with a calm look on their face. It simply amazes me when I see people dodge a big huge bus rushing towards them with a gentle and not to forget accurate movement of their hips. And while doing so, continue to merrily talk on their phone, like nothing out of the ordinary happened.
Not to forget the fast and furious 2-wheelers on the roads. You can see kids, toddlers dozing just behind the handle bars; while the rider coolly, races just against the wheels of a loaded truck. Only a fool would say this is not dangerous. But people are like this, or I think have learned to live like this; art of risking lives.
And the mighty comfy 4 wheeler cars, what can I say! Every car driver seem to have lost their patience! If a car slows down or God forbids stops on the road to give way to an old couple crossing the road, the cars behind will honk to glory and will not miss to shout a few bad words. It costs agony to be courteous while driving - be it to the pedestrians or fellow cars.

Why are the buses, cars, bikes and pedestrians so careless? I will make sure I cross the road, others go to hell. I will make sure I race the trucks, who cares of the on coming traffic- they'll stop or find a way out. I will make sure I drive my slow truck on the fast moving lane, who cares if I am slowing the traffic on a free way?

Why are we so inconsiderate?

I think the learning starts at home. How many times do parents stop kids from throwing a banana skin on the road? Forget kids, how many times do people think twice before spitting on the road or throwing thrash on the roads? Keep your houses clean, don't care of the neighbors, or a passer by. You may think uneducated would behave like this. But education plays a very small part here.

One day I was watching a lady and her grandson water plants in a building complex. There were no water pipes, they had to fill water in a bucket from a tap which was a little far from the plant bed. After several trips, all the plants were watered except a few at the end. As the kid was going to water those, the granny stops the kid saying, no no don't water them, those are not ours! What? You planted a few plants in the building complex, so they become yours? But those others, ignore those? What would you loose to water the rest of plants and use the water you had with you? What is that you are teaching your kid?

This is just one example. We can see a similar kind of behavior even in corporate places. How many times do you see people walking in groups, occupying the full breadth of a road? Or people standing right at the entrance of a door or gate and engrossed in talking? Or how many people hold the door for you? In fact if someone happens to hold the door, the next few in line would see how best to squeeze through the open door.

The attitude of keep ourselves, our family and friends happy, while others don't exists - is ruining us. 'Being Human' is just a brand of clothes worn but not understood. Soon, more and more generations down the line will become more oblivious of those around.

Why are we turning out like this? 

Visit to a temple

One day we were visiting a temple near our house. It was some occasion, I don't particularly remember. So the place was crowded with people from different paths of life, young, old, locals, some visitors. As soon as we entered the temple, I saw some women filling 'daone' (a sweet that is offered in the name of God and then distributed among the devotees as prasad-basically return gift from temple). I was excited to help too. They were very happy to have another helping hand. So after a quick 'darshan' in the temple, I went and joined the volunteers. What surprised me was none of the people (my friends and relatives) except one came forward and joined me to help. They preferred sitting right in front of the deity seeking blessings.
This bothers me. You are in a temple seeking for blessings or some kind of connection with God. What better way than to offer service? People tend to do things that they have been seeing and doing from childhood. Go to temple, offer flowers, money to God, make promises to offer more money or some goods IF my dreams get fulfilled.
Ok, ok. May be I am being too judgmental. We may not know what people have going in their lives. May be just sitting before the idol brings peace they are looking for. But then I don't see that sincerity in their behavior while in the temple either. They would start gossiping with friends and relatives that they meet, or show off their expensive jewelry or sarees. You can hardly see anyone with eyes closed, calm composure, relaxed. Everyone seems to have a anxious look on their face, as if remembering all the sin they have committed and waiting for God's pardon. The focus is more on, have I completed all the rituals properly? Did I take 1 or 3 turns around the idol. Did I ring the temple bell when I entered. Did I do a saashtaang namaskar (pray bending knees down on the floor, nose touching floor)? Did I get to eat the prasad! Do I have enough to share with my folks back home who are not with me. Did I give enough money to perform some ritual and did the priest say my name correctly before God. Else, God may give blessings to someone else by mistake.
So while I was enjoying talking to the strangers while filling the prasad, the temple bells begin to ring loud, announcing an aarti; basically the time when priest talks to God asking for blessings for people present before him and offers the prasad and distributes it among people. BTW, this is also the time, he goes around with a lighted diya and people make sure they get to touch the diya; otherwise the temple visit will not be complete. Priests collect money (small change) as he carries out this act.
So, as the bells started ringing, people with me left whatever they were doing and ran inside the temple. I had no choice but to follow them. The scene inside the temple was chaotic. There was a big rush, each one trying to get in front so that they can 'see' the idol clearly. My friends and relatives were not behind either. One shouted to the other 'come this way', almost pushing few others along the way.
Here my problem was, how can people not understand that just like how important it is for you to get the 'darshan' and the best spot, so it is for other people too. What if one of your relative cannot stand in front? What if one of your relative cannot touch the diya when the priest comes with the diyas? Don't you see others are humans too and probably God would like some order while prayers are being offered. So let those who got ahead get the best view and be the first to get the prasad. Why this race and fight?
Again this bothers me. No one seem to be considerate of a fellow being. Even at an auspicious place like a temple.
Outside the temple, you can usually see some beggars seeking the temple visitor's kindness and begging for a a few rupees. And usually what is the reaction from the people they get? They are completely ignored or looked at with doubt that these beggars may rob my shoes I left at the door. Very few are kind enough to give some change to them.
Again this bothers me. You can spend hundreds on some rituals and prasad, but cannot spare a little to some needy? I've heard people say that these beggars should not waste their time on easy money but go look for some job and earn money in a more dignified way. But my point is, if you give the same money that you would otherwise offer to the temple, to the beggar instead, will you become poor? Temple has enough money. May be with the money you give to the temple, the God idol will be painted in gold, or worn some expensive jewelry. Why do we need this drama? Why not make use of the money to feed someone who cannot afford a day's meal? May be with the money you give, they will be able to apply for a job.
What is your imagination of God? How do you please and seek God's blessings? Do you question the ways you have been taught? No, then why not? 

In India...

After staying in US for over 3 years, we shifted to India in March 2013. While in US, for last couple of years, I had tried to make positive changes in my day to day life, by taking up meditation, reading, being with nature, involving myself in volunteering activities whenever possible. My motive was to find out the secret of being happy, how mind and emotions work, learn what it meant to be free. I was reading and following some of the gurus by reading their biographies, their teachings etc. I was very excited to come to India, most importantly looking from my search for life's meaning path that I thought I was on. I don't claim to have taken up the right or best approach or techniques. But I knew I was eager and willing to put effort to know the unknown.
I knew that when we move to India, meditation, volunteering activities, interacting with people, sharing, caring, giving, learning would become less of an effort. For example, I thought getting involved in some volunteering activity in India would be easier as I would know more people, also there are more people who need help. I thought meditation or listening to scriptures or being part of satsangs would be easier than it was in US. I want to share how it turned out.

Meditation had become a regular practice for me and I was not sure if I could continue the same when in India. When we reached India, we were put up in our company guest house for a month. Every time I sat for my practice, either there were people upstairs, downstairs making noise, someone screaming, cars stuck in traffic honking non stop, some construction sound in the background. I was not used to do my practice with so much noise pollution. I thought, may be people in India who do practice meditation must be experts to be able to filter out this noise.
In office I found out that there is a meditation room open 8 am to 4 pm and was extremely delighted. With lot of time spent in daily commute, it was next to impossible to dedicate regular time at home sitting quietly concentrating on thoughts and mind and breath! So office meditation room was a blessing. But the attraction soon faded off. First day when I was in middle of my Oooommm recital (in my mind, eyes closed), a heard someone bang the door as he/she made her way in the room. Then thomp! thomp! threw her heavy bag on the floor. Psst, psst made some sound like she had a bad day (btw, the day had just started). Then started doing yogasanas making panting sound at every posture she changed. How inconsiderate! Obviously I was so annoyed. Why are we allowing yoga exercises in the mediation room? Can we keep separate hours for yoga, I inquired. But to my surprise, all I got in response was, we should adjust.
I thought to myself, I should be accommodating. I should try to come in some other time in the day. But somehow, whatever time I tried for next few days, I was disturbed by that girl (somehow it seemed like we both followed each others timings for few days) or someone else. Soon, I learned to ignore the distraction and do what I had to do. But I noticed one change in me. Initial few days, I tiptoed in the room if I saw someone sitting in meditation. But now I did not try to tiptoe or push the door slowly as I entered. I knew people did not care; no one either complained if I shut the door hard, or were grateful if I tiptoed. Unfortunately, I had become like one of the others. Well! Soon after, I did not even feel bad that I did not care.
Talking of distractions in that room, one day I was sitting in one corner calm and relaxed, counting my breathing. Suddenly I hear a fart! Loud noise and then such bad odor, I could puke. I wanted to get up and run. But I felt irresponsible if I stopped mid way, so i continued and fought the smell like a warrior. But all the while I only thought, why the hell people don't clean their tummy before a workout or meditation, or just walk out if they feel the urge. I was so annoyed! But I braved the storm (in fact one other time too) and learned to adjust.

As soon as I joined office, I got informed of a volunteering drive in campus. Mainly the idea was to collect money from people in the office and help needy students with books and stationary. I was very thrilled and was eager to be part of the initiative. The event was a success and the intended needs were met. But I was so surprised to see the participation and volunteer numbers who stepped up. Mere less than 100 out of 20,000 odd people volunteered. Even whose who did, did not show the eagerness to help. Some did not show up in meetings, were too shy to ask for money from people, could not contribute any ideas that could help the cause, were least bothered to know what was happening and how the event was progressing.
When we went for collection, the responses we got from people was even worse. Why should we contribute? Explain to us how the money will be spent. What is the guarantee that the students need what we are giving them? Well, c'mon! All the information is available online. Do you think the money will be misused? Then don't give, but don't dishearten those who want to! What I struggled to understand was, why was it so difficult to trust such an initiative? We were part of the same company, all information was transparent. What else?

I think this post may end up being too long. I'll continue in my next. 

Conversations with God - Book

I picked this book - 'Conversations with God' by Neale Donald Walsch from the library. This is the second time I picked it up. The first time round I could not read beyond couple of pages. A friend had suggested this book to me, and at that time it seemed artificial and something I could not comprehend.
This time I was looking for answers. More than answers to specific questions, I was looking to explore and understand this explanation of Life and  God.

The language used in the book is very casual - not something we imagine God can talk to us.

Below are some lines from the book, which I had noted down. 

The deepest secret is that life is not a process of discovery, but a process of creation. You are not discovering yourself, but creating yourself anew. (Thoughts, word, action - that's how).

There is only one purpose for all of life, and that is for you and all that lives to experience fullest glory. The soul knows all there is to know all the time. Yet knowing is not enough. The soul seeks to experience.

Judge not, then, the karmic path walked by another. Envy not success, nor pity failure, for you know not what is success and failure in the soul's reckoning.And know that what you do in the tune of your greatest trial can be your greatest triumph. For the experience you create is a statement of who you are and who you want to be.
You life is always a result of your thoughts about it - including your obviously creative thought that you seldom get what you choose. Your life proceeds out of your intentions for it.


In the largest sense, all the "bad" things that happen are of your choosing. The mistake is not in choosing them, but in calling them bad. For in calling them bad, you call your self bad, since you created them. This label you cannot accept, so rather than label self bad, you disown your own creations.You cannot change the outer event (for that has been created by the lot of you, and you are not grown enough in your consciousness to alter individually that which has been created collectively), so you must change the inner experience. Nothing is painful in and of itself. Pain is a result of wrong thought. It is an error in thinking.
Pain results from a judgement you have made about a thing. Remove the judgement and the pain disappears.

Affirmations do not work if they are merely statements of what you want to be true. Affirmations work only when they are statements of something you already know to be true.
If, now, there is something you choose to experience in your life, do not "want" it- choose it.

The actions of the body were meant to be reflections of a state of being, not attempts to attain a state of being.
In true order of things one does not do things in order to be happy - one is happy and hence does things. One does not do things in order to be compassionate, one is compassionate and, hence, acts in a certain way. The soul's decision precedes the body's action in a highly conscious person. Only an unconscious person attempts to produce a state of the soul through something the body is doing.

Your life work is a statement of who you are. If it is not, then why are you doing it?
Do you imagine that you have to? You don't have to do anything.

If "Man who supports his family at all cost, even his own happiness" is who you are then love your work, because it is facilitating your creation of a living statement of Self.
If " woman who works at a job she hates in order to meet responsibilities as she sees them" is who you are then love love love your job for it totally supports your self image, your self concept.
Everyone can love everything the moment they understand what they are doing, and why.
No one does anything he doesn't want to do.

Live your life Now

After we were back from the trip to Salt Lake City, I got to know the terrible news of a fatal accident on a busy street near our house that took the lives of two young cousins. Both were driving back from a baptism ceremony when a car hit theirs at a signal. I was surprised to know that this street where cars don't go more than 25 or 30 mph could kill someone in an accident. We pass that road very often and cannot stop thinking of the lives lost and their families.
On talking about this accident to another friend, she told me of her Aunt who was killed in  an accident crossing a road. She was walking back from a grocery store and the truck driver turned on a free right not seeing her. Her son still goes to the grocery store hoping to find her there.
We all heard the shooting at the Colorado theater. People had got together to just have some good time but for those few it was their last.
And then we heard of the shooting at the Gurudwara in Wisconsin.
I met a colleague of mine whose Mom was diagnosed with Cancer couple of weeks back. I could not imagine the stress and emotions going through the young girl's mind.

For a moment think of these people. What goes through your mind? You feel sad I am sure. What do you feel about your life?
Do you still want to worry about the chores left incomplete? Or keep the grudge for a friend since college days? The extra pounds on your hips? The exam you could not clear. Your life long wish to have kids, in this year and these many. Your dream of spending your life with Mr right going wrong. The job I could have got if only I applied at the right time.I cannot stress enough on the importance of 'now', the moment we have. The tragedies listed above is a reminder to live the present moment. That's all we have. This very breath you took in, feel the warmth, remember your relation to the Being, feel grateful. As you breath out relax your mind and be assured all is well, everything is going to be OK. 
Don't wait for the perfect conditions to learn something new. Start now. If you are thinking of a friend you want to talk to, call them now.
You are feeling this is the end of world, nothing is going right for you? Remember, it is just a moment that will pass too. You are part of this universe that has gone through infinite changes and continuously does. You have that power of change in you. You have the power to be happy.

If you want to be happy, be.  ~Leo Tolstoy

We own every situation we are in and should take full responsibility for it.
You cannot control all life events, but you can control how you feel. Believe that every problem has a solution. If you continue to get lost in your egoistic endeavors, you will remain in the constant cycle of loss and pain. Break this cycle of unrealistic hopes. If you feel emotionally down, don't look for answers now. Wait till your mind is clear of all the noise. For now, just be aware of the thoughts that come to your mind. Don't fight them. And don't glue yourself to them to continue crying for what happened.
Welcome every moment as the last you will have or the first you ever had.

There are many times I feel lost and doubt God's power. The meditation, the knowledge I get from reading books or meeting people, of what 'use' is it to me? But every time I have come to only one conclusion - and that is, as soon as you keep yourself separated from worldly 'norms' and 'pleasures' and 'the rat race', the fear of 'something bad' and your mind is in the 'Now', there is place for only peace and happiness. And that is the aim in life isn't it?
You ease into the worldly 'norms'. You experience the 'pleasure' of being alive. You win your 'rat race' because these are your own mind made. The 'something bad' you think will happen is ALL in your mind. So just relax your mind. Your present moment was your future in your past. Got it? So you have the choice how you want to live it or rather I should say, how you want your future to be. 

Don't give up

With practice, you come to realize that our life experiences relate directly to our psychological wellness, habitual consciousness and our understanding of the purpose of life. Practicing meditation takes you closer to your inner self and makes way to live life with the higher understanding and maturity.    

However, many times we tend to go back to the old patterns of crying and wining and worrying i.e. shifting attention from 'now' to that unreal moments of 'what ifs' or 'whys'. Our lives and minds are trained to go back to the relentless circle of worry, regrets, chaos, sadness, fear. Being on the path of spiritual awakening can be a continuous struggle. But don't give up. 

When the world says, ‘Give up,’ Hope whispers, ‘Try it one more time.’ ~ Unknown. 

There are so many energy flows around us that can cause us to sway away to the 'easy mind trick' to go back to the comfortable and those familiar feelings of anxiety and helplessness. One of the things I have noticed to influence me is the health of the body. Hunger, thirst and lack of sleep seem to be obvious reasons but are easily ignored. Attend to the health of the body. 
Negative influences and or people who always complain or never find time to talk about good things. If possible we could try and talk to them to help them know their true potential. But until you get to yours and if they are affecting your progress, better to avoid them.
Believe it or not but full moons and new moons can cause enough energy to make you loose 'your center'. Ever felt restless for no reason? Check the lunar calendar :)
And of course hormones! Do I say more? 

Know that you can get back to your inner core as quickly as your next breath. Breath-in to connect to the Life Source and breath-out and relax all the thoughts that cross your mind. By nature, we are at peace. We are full of love. We have got a small shot at life (earthly life, don't know what is after). Live every now and breath every moment. Separate out the situations you are in, from your true nature. Whatever are those situations, be present.
If you know the situation that you are in will continue for some more time, will you wait to be happy after it changes? Then it may be your whole lifetime because you are trusting your mind to decide if you are happy; and mind keeps changing the definition of happiness with situations.

"The meaning of life is to find your gift, the purpose of life is to give it away."
~Joy J. Golliver

This post is mainly to say that Life's gift is right next to overcoming small barriers. Don't give up. 

Meditation - what to expect

Meditation is the ability to be in a state of awareness which is beyond place, whats going on around you, thoughts in your mind and beyond time. With practice, you have the ability to meditate anytime and any place. This meditative state is inherent to everyone of us. But gets lost somewhere amidst the train of thoughts approaching and leaving our mind.

The whole idea is to focus on one thing such that you stop the flow of thoughts and completely relax and get connected to the inner stillness. It could be looking at an object while concentrating on the breath. Somebody told me how cooking was meditative to her as it relaxed and calmed her mind. In the Art of Living Silent course, there was a meditation session that used physical pain to focus. For some people it is praying and chanting while for others it is cooking or exercising or going out for a walk. Everything is a theory, so if something works for you, go with it.

How do I meditate?
I usually start with Art of living short Kriya or the last breathing rounds. That way I am able to relax and become aware of the thoughts. I imagine 'me' as a being who is beyond the thoughts and just acknowledge any thought that comes to my mind. I can listen to the silence around me. Then I use one of this below techniques.
Become aware that you are in a room, which is part of the house, your parking lot, your city, all trees you saw during your walks in the parks, the mountains. You then slowly move your awareness of your being in the country, the other side of the earth, the relativity to sun, the moon, planets, solar system, galaxies and so on. As I do that, my mind becomes so quite that I feel I am part of the space in the universe.

All this sounds fiction. Isn't it? I am finding it funny as I type this but this is what I do and works for me. I picked this process (or like process) from Love yourself like your life depends on it, by Ravikant. There is a some special power you experience when you imagine yourself being part of the bigger part of this universe.
I keep my mind focused on my breath all the time.
Sometimes I try the other way round, where I imagine my whole body, the organs, blood, the cells, the particles in the cell and so on till I get to the electrons. That energy, the space between those particles. I feel part of that.

Do I get cut out from everything in this state?
Not at all. I don't know about others, but I don't. I can still hear if my phone rings. I can still hear if the water tap next to my room is opened. But I am relaxed to a point where I just want to continue breathing. I just want to continue observing the stillness, the quietness. The breath is so slow, like a baby.

How can I make use of meditation other than the time I actually sit to meditate?
Well, its the honey you have tasted. You have been in touch with the innermost core of yourself; which I have believed to be love.
As I breath in, I tell myself how much I love myself and think of the meditative state I know of. As I breath out, if there were any other thoughts I say 'OK'. I know I don't have to deal with them at that time. But I don't want to stop them either.

What is the Success Rate of this whole process?
There are times I sit for 1/2 hour and I feel I was in there for 5 minutes. Other times I sit for 5 minutes and I feel it is 1/2 hour.
The success depends on how much you work hard. No, no. You don't need to work hard to meditate; in fact it should be just the opposite; effortless. The effort is in getting yourself to spare some time of your day to meditate; those 10 minutes you want to invest on yourself. To leave the bed of laziness and sit on the floor of meditation.

It was challenging for me to make meditation as a everyday process. I still don't get time everyday. I had promised myself that I would make it regular and used to get very disappointed if I missed a schedule. But with practice, I am learning that we don't have to be over critical to ourselves. Just listen to the moment. Make sure you have a comfortable and quite place to meditate and the will to. If not, no point wasting time, you rather do something else.

The power of being in the moment of 'now' is magical. If I struggle and keep getting distracted, I simply observe the frustration and my reaction to that situation. And slowly I am learning that this process can be applied to everything in life. Every situation, emotion, interactions, likes, dislikes, communication and so on.

Key is to keep the light of life alive through love and being in the now. Through meditation or other ways. It could be thanking small things in life, awareness meditation where you focus on everything you do like while eating, taste the food, bite every piece of food. Be aware of every moment like walking, hugging someone, talking and so on. Observing the trees and birds when you go out for a walk. Watch a baby laugh or cry.
Nature gives us all the opportunities; we just need to be present. 

Men's Cycling Race - Olympics 2012

We are in Salt Lake City and guess what we spend the morning doing? Well, watched the Mens Cycling Road Race (Olympics, London). Well, I would never have spent time watching these races if I was in home in SF. I would have been busy watching DID Iil Masters!
But I was so luckty to catch the glimpse of this 39 year old win the gold.
While Navin is in line to get the car rental, I got time for internet!! And could look up the statistics for VINOKUROV Alexandr Race from Rank 61 to 1!!! It was time well spent experiencing the moment and feeling happy for him.

Rank Bib Athlete Time + 1 87  VINOKUROV Alexandr 5:45:57 - Distance Rank Time TBL Split Lap 1 - 74.7 Km 61 1:51:42 +5:27 1:51:42 Lap 1 - 90.3 Km 64 2:14:17 +5:14 22:35 (9) Lap 2 - 105.9 Km 24 2:37:37 +6:00 23:20 (14) Lap 3 - 121.5 Km 17 2:59:24 +4:25 21:47 (4) Lap 4 - 137.1 Km 36 3:21:50 +3:48 22:26 (112) Lap 5 - 152.7 Km 42 3:42:35 +1:56 20:45 (19) Lap 6 - 168.3 Km 52 4:04:18 +1:24 21:43 (12) Lap 7 - 183.9 Km 37 4:25:50 +0:53 21:32 (15) Lap 8 - 199.5 Km 26 4:47:27 +1:04 21:37 (6) Finish - 249.5 Km 1 5:45:57 0:00 -

Source - london2012.com

The Secret

In the last few days there has been a major shift in the way I look at life. Importance and impact of living in the present moment has not been more revealing and rewarding. So what changed or what caused this change? Frankly, I don't recall exactly what and why, but want to share my learning here in the hope that someone will benefit just the way I did.


Quite frankly I don't know where I should begin this post. So let me tell you of a book I came across Tim Ferris FB feed. He shared a book by an Indian author Kamal Ravikant; book name was 'Love yourself like your life depends on it'.
Indian Author, 5 star rating to this book and 99 cents download on Amazon, I thought to myself, sure!
What is in the book? Well, just what the title says - love yourself like your life depends on it. I would highly recommend this book to everybody.
The Author has described things he did to get out of rut; to bring changes in his own life; for miracles to work. And believe it or not, those things have definitely helped me get aligned with 'my being' and get 'on track' on my journey to happiness. I don't want to give out more details from this book; it is just some 50 odd pages I think and takes less than an hour to finish. Only advice I can give is keep your mind open and try out some of the things. I am sure you will see a change; anyway there is nothing to loose.

Our minds are busy all the time building false dreams, fear of uncertainties or remembering times of despair, sadness or simply going back memory lanes explaining self, how beautiful life was (which means it is not now or less now) or worse telling what bad things can happen to us.
This chatter has such an impact on our subconscious mind that it creates life patterns and situations that follow the feelings and emotions our thoughts produce. So then, one way is to break those patterns. Correct? And the answer to that is my secret. Actually the secret opens roads wide open to endless possibilities. Bringing 'magic' back to your life, the freedom and innocence and happiness your childhood mind had.

So as you may have guessed secret lies in being in the present moment; being in the now. There are many ways to achieve this not-so-easy task. Such an obvious fix to Life's problems, we may think. But took me this long to figure out. Some people don't even get that chance or opportunity.

And why would you do this? Why would you want to bring about this change? Because of Love! We our this source and it is our very nature. Goes back to the book 'love yourself like your life depends on it'.

The more I talk about this, I feel I am being repetitive. But that is what it is. Every explanation of Life's meaning, findings and truth leads to this simple state of Now.

What is Life? What is our part in this life? I have often been struck by this question.We are born, cared for, get education, make friends, go into relationships, earn big bucks, fulfill dreams of big house, big car, big business, get married, raise kids, get them married, get retired, travel places.
But before we get to each of this, there is so much anxiety, fear of failure, sadness of loss, bad memories.

What if I get to all this sooner than I planned? What if I don't get to this at all?

What I have began to realize is that all this doesn't matter. Because if you want something this Life is going to get you to it anyways. You just need to have the intention. As simple as that. Then what's the fear about? What's the hurry?
Problem is like I said before. The mind has so much fear, worry, sorrow and negativity going on already, the universe thinks, that is what you want and gives it back to you.

Living in the present moment has taught me many things I want to share. 

• Life's achievement is how you can make your life simple. Sacredness lies in simplicity. 
• Happiness is in 'mindful' living. Mindful - as in present - being in the now.
• Have faith in God - the Life Force - the super being, whatever you want to call it. It knows what is best for you. Surrender to the present moment. 
• Meditate to connect to the innermost magical Life force. Feel the connection to the Universe. 
• It is not easy to change the habits; you will be bogged down and will go through tons of emotions. It's OK, just part of the process. 
• Find abundance in all small things you would otherwise ignore. 

I would love to continue writing but got to go. But I will continue to share my experiences and how I learn to make these changes. 

Blind Faith

'In everybody’s life there’s a point of no return. And in a very few cases, a point where you can’t go forward anymore. And when we reach that point, all we can do is quietly accept the fact. That’s how we survive.'
~ Haruki Murakami, Kafka on the Shore

We all go through bad times. For many people it may be less painful whereas for others it is life changing. Whatever be the case, if you are told that doing so and so thing will help you bring positive energy into your life or help you get what you want, would you do it? It may not sound logical at all or scientific in any sense. Would you still do it?

I remember I was in school. My uncle who was in his late 30's was diagnosed with brain tumor. My Aunt obviously sought all kinds of medication and best doctors help. My uncle's health deteriorated within few months. I remember an incident where my aunt came home late one day. She did not tell where she was going when she left either. Later she told that one of her colleagues at work recommended a tantric/mantric who did some kind of homa! or whatever she could not explain.
Coming from a well educated family and my Aunt herself being sophisticated and modern (like they say) was trapped in this kind of drama! Not knowing who these tantrics are or what they do, she risked herself going to some far off forbidden place and was ready to try anything to get my Uncle's health back.

Obviously people ridiculed her. But now when I think of that incident, I can understand the hopelessness my Aunt would have felt. You try to keep faith in God, supernatural powers and just hope that magic happens. Your mind is already stressed out that you will try anything and everything. You are so desperate.

There have been many other such incidents that make me wonder, how far out would you go on blind faith? Even if you usually don't believe in such things, would you still chase them?

I personally would have done the same thing my Aunt did. People may call it blind faith, but for people who go through it, it is hope.

Marriage Anniversary

In life only thing worth holding on to is each other. We complete 5 years of our marriage - and what a journey it has been!
So many things have changed, so many new things have evolved. Lots of happy moments, many more fights and arguments, new learning, unlearning.
We have felt the world move by, while we stood holding each other's hands.

I pray to God this story continues. 

30 day drawing challenge - Day 11 - Turning Point in your Life

The truth does exist, and when the truth is honestly sought, with a mind that is ready to accept the truth, whatever the truth turns out to be, then the answers do come, and the answers change people." ~ Evan Harris Walker

There have been many ups and downs in life and many events that have made a big impact on me.
Getting associated with Art of Living has changed my life and I consider that as the turning point in my life. Art of living has introduced me to Meditation, Yoga which has helped me cope with depression and make progress in my spiritual path. 

I am still learning to live my life as it is meant to be. 

Time to move on

Kabhi kabhi mere dil main khayal ata hain
Tum hote to aisa hota
Tum hote to waisa hota

Kabhi kabhi mere dil main khayal ata hain

Would have been one happy day today but God had other plans.
I move on with the belief and trust that God is looking over and only the best happens to us.

Cannot believe time has gone by so quickly. Would have been my due date today. Feels so awkward that I am saying 'my due' because that was never mine to keep. May bad times and memories fade away like a bad dream.

I am doing much better, in fact the best I've been in a long time. I have put all that happened behind me and look forward to good things.

Fortunately/unfortunately I have come across many people and their stories that helped me understand pain and true meaning of strength.
These people have been around me for so long. But I never gave a second thought to how they faced life's challenges. I thought of other's problems -  like those are things they needed to deal with. And that it's easy because it is what it is and cannot change.
But only a loss as bad as an incomplete pregnancy and the physical pain that goes with it could move me so much. God knows how to straighten us.

Magic in the sky

Most beautiful colors in the sky! Felt the colors just dissolve in me.
I feel privileged and happy to have witnessed these magical moments.


This song kept playing in my mind -



Subah ki kirno ko rokein jo salaakhein hai kahan
Jo khayalon pe pehre daale woh aankhein hai kahan
Par khulne ki deri hai parinde udh ke jhoomenge
Aasman aasman aasman


Kahani khatam hai ya shuruwaat hone ke hai
Subha nayi hai yeh ya phir raat hone ko hai
Kahani khatam hai ya shuruwaat hone ke hai
Subha nayi hai yeh ya phir raat hone ko hai